If you have been adversely affected by someone with borderline or narcissistic disorder please share your story, and find support you do deserve to be heard too.

But this toxic rag just isolates and stereotypes Borderlines more and makes healthy relationships and assistance that much further out of tech. That’s like comparing asthma to diabetes, or cancer to kidney stones. Second, stop grouping us in with narcissistic personality disorder, THEY. Read moreįirst off Borderlines didn’t get here on our own, we were made the way we are by other people and traumas. It presents a realistic, yet compassionate, attitude toward the self-destructive nature of these relationships, and gives real life examples of how individuals have let go of their Caretaker behaviors with creative and effective solutions.

It describes how to get out of destructive interactions with the Borderline or Narcissist and how to take new, more effective actions to focus on personal wants, needs, and life goals while allowing the Borderline or Narcissist to take care of themselves. The book looks at the underlying rules and expectations in these relationships and shows Caretaker’s how to move themselves out of these rigid interactions and into a healthier, more productive, and positive lifestyle-with or without the Borderline/Narcissistic partner or family member. This compromises the Caretaker’s self-esteem, distorts their thinking processes, and locks them into a Victim-Persecutor-Rescuer pattern with the Borderline or Narcissist. Caretakers give up their sense of self to become who and what the Borderline or Narcissist needs them to be. Here, Margalis Fjelstad describes how people get into a Caretaker role with a Borderline or Narcissist, and how they can get out. These negative behaviors don’t happen once in a while, they happen almost continuously in their intimate relationships and most often, and especially with their Caretaker family member. Their ability to function normally or pleasantly can suddenly change in an instant, like flipping a switch. However, in intimate relationships, they can be emotional, aggressive, demeaning, illogical, paranoid, accusing, and controlling-in the extreme.

Often they appear to be normally functioning at work and in public interactions, and Narcissists may even be highly effective, in the short term, in some work or social situations. People with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorders have a serious mental illness that primarily affects their intimate, personal, and family relationships.

Margalis fjelstad stop caretaking